Yes, World of Warcraft, there are girls on the internets.

October 1, 2007

The Elusive Wolpertinger


I already talked a little bit about the wolpertinger in the Brewfest Quest Guide, but for those of you itching to know more about this cryptozoological marvel, here are some fun facts on the newest non-combat Warcraft pet. Wolpertingers are mythical Bavarian creatures that may resemble rabbits or squirrels. They have antlers, wings, and nasty big pointy teeth, and bear a close similarity to a number of legendary European horned mammals, as well as the American jackalope. If you're wondering why lagomorphs-with-antlers are such a common theme in cryptozoology, look no further than the Shope papillomavirus, a nasty little cancer-causing virus that causes bone-like tumors to grow out of infected rabbits' heads.

As for how to catch a wolpertinger, the cryptozoology.com forums suggest you can catch them during a full moon with a candle or lantern and an empty potato sack. The Museum of Hoaxes tells a different story:

"Wolpertingers have a weakness for female beauty. The woman should go out into a forest at night while the moon is full and find a secluded nook where a Wolpertinger is likely to be. Hopefully, the creature will soon reveal itself. When it does the woman should expose her breasts. This will cause the Wolpertinger to instantly fall into a stupor, allowing it to easily be bagged."
Smooth move, male wolpertinger hunters of yore. Smooth move indeed.

8 comments:

Unknown said...

Who would have thought that Wolperingers were such mashers?

L said...

The stunned staring wouldn't be so bad, if they didn't look quite so ready to go all vorpal bunny at the drop of a hat.

Or a shirt.

SonofMoag said...

Great new idea for a date: Wolpertinger hunting.
Sure to be a hit in the college communities.

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